Last week I decided on a whim to do this cleanse - my friend mentioned that she was considering it and so checked it out. It looked legit - here it is Dr. Oz's 3-Day Detox. I had been feeling very digestively uncomfortable lately and I'm kind of hoping that this will help.
So - I wake up yesterday and do not forget that I can't have coffee (beginning of sadness) and, because I mistakenly think that mint-flavored green tea works as well as regular green tea, I down a cup of minty/lemony blah. I won't do that again (in fact I make a trip to the store to buy regular green tea shortly thereafter to avoid this particular grossness in future). Next I consume the breakfast smoothie.
Then I go to the track and run 4 miles. Because I'm nuts. And also because I want to do this on July 1. Following the run things pretty much go down hill. The lunch smoothie is AWFUL. It tastes like what I would imagine a pile of lawn clippings with lime juice poured on it would - if you forgot to take all the lime rind off before you squished the juice onto the pile. And it's BIG. Like 2 Litres big. And far too ugly to post a pic of - I think that in the horror of grinding up an entire cucumber, 4 celery sticks, and half of a lime I forgot to pause to take a picture. There is also pineapple in this smoothie - but there might as well not be because you cannot taste it AT ALL. Even my blender rebels - I have to take the ingredients out and re-chop them TWICE. Maybe my blender is saying "stop this craziness! After years of making you yummy iced lattes and fruity delicious frozen things - WHY??!!" I should have listened.
Perhaps it is the cold weather - but I think that it is the smoothie - I get the shakes, curl up like a fetus in a blanket on the couch, and shiver for a while. At this point I cave and drink a cup of coffee. If it wasn't for the contamination of lawn-clipping taste, that coffee would have been incredible. My husband walks out of his office at this point and says "it smells like fresh-cut lawn out here." Apparently the smell is radiating off of me. And all this despite the fact that I only choked down HALF of it! But coffee ends the shakes and I get up and do laundry.
Dinner is less awful - mainly because I choose to not put cayenne pepper in my smoothie (Really Dr. Oz?). This (below) is it. Looks nice, right? Nope. It tastes like kale too.
When I am done I hope I have news like this to report click here for amazing weight loss stories but likely I will just report that it's wonderful to eat hot food again and that I love coffee forever no matter what Dr. Oz says.